Pshh iPhone who would want that? My n95 has a flip out keyboard much better than some stupid touchscreen phone that doesn’t even have a camera.

She’s clearly injecting corn with gmos, digitally altered cyber 5g dna. It’s as plain as the visor on my face.

Maybe it’s a horse box and the driver is a beastiality enthusiast.

When I was a kid we still recorded stuff off the radio and copied our zx spectrum games on the family hi-fi. I’d say good times but it’s so much better now I can pirate everything in great quality from teh interwebs.

Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it friend.

Tissues are the real cost. Fortunately I have no soul.

Maybe you don’t but many people want a romantic and sexual relationship. There are many things that we don’t need to survive but make our lives vastly more enjoyable. I’ve had long term relationships and times where I’ve been single and while I enjoy my own company and the freedom being single I do miss the closeness of a romantic relationship. Friendships are great but it’s not the same.

The cake is a lie etc

That and varicose veins.

What you don’t want your food cold and stale and delivered in a week and a half?

Somewhat but I could be happier.

He was supposed to die at 8pm not 11am.

It’s far from pointless, these large companies hire psychologists to help them with the layouts of their shops. They tend to move staples around so people have to look around for them increasing the chances they’ll spot something they don’t need but will buybon an impulse. I used to work for one of the largest supermarket chains in the uk, they have an empty store that they use just for planning the layout of goods. Alot of time and money goes into these decisions.

I can’t wait for brentrance or maybe brenetration?

It was a vain attempt at humour.

I live in Scotland it’s so damp that you can’t start a fire with fire let alone a cigarette butt.

Did somebody shit themselves again!! People with loose anus should tuck their trousers into their socks.

The worst thing about social networks is the people. Maybe we could just use ai to generate every response, fine tuned to the kind of conversation you specifically want. Yeah that’ll fix it.

Obviously she said ‘only if I can sit on your face’ seriously have you seen that schnozz.

I wanted to be a holy fool but I’m an atheist so fool it is.